This is me, bored, pretending to be Eminem to some kid on a chat room. I'm sad. But it's pretty funny:
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: yo, whattup
You: i'm Marshall
Stranger: cool nice to meet you im kieren
You: where you from?
Stranger: scotland you?
You: in america
You: how old are you, kieren?
Stranger: 16, you?
You: i got a daughter who's nearly 16
Stranger: cool wats it like in detroit the now?
You: detroit's in a bad place, man
Stranger: thats crap wats up man?
You: but we're strong. DETROIT!
You: STAND UP!
Stranger: i love this city
You: you love the D?
Stranger: sorry just had to lol
You: haha, it's cool
You: i think i been to Scotland a few times
You: i was at Edinburgh recently, doing a show
You: you guys are cool over there
Stranger: yeah its the capital
Stranger: nice wat show?
Stranger: haha thanks man so are u guys
You: a concert. i make music
You: i did a show called "T in the Park"
Stranger: nice i bet ur good at it if u were in a show
You: you heard of that?
You: oh sorry, Balado
Stranger: ohhhhh yeah its brilliant
You: Balado Park?
Stranger: iv not heard if it sorry :(
You: it's cool
You: i think i might be coming to Scotland again once i finish my next album
Stranger: nice wats it called?
You: the name of my new album? i dunno yet, man
You: i'll drop it when life tells me to
Stranger: ohhh right cool man and what?
You: at the moment i'm just banging out tracks in the studio
Stranger: cool :)
You: you might have heard of my last album Recovery?
Stranger: NO FUCKING WAY DUDE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Stranger: UR EMINEM???????
You: that's me
You: i'm just a normal person, man, don't freak out!
Stranger: i loved ur duet with rhianna man that song touched me i love ur work
Stranger: i know ur totaly sound mate
You: haha. thanks man, I appreciate that
Stranger: earlier i was like i was wondering if it was you but i was like no chance
You: Hey...I might be famous but I still go online
Stranger: true mate so what brings you to omegle?
You: well, I told my manager Paul that i wanted to go on the internet
You: and he hit me up with this chat. I dunno how the shit works, to be honest
You: my daughters know more about this internet shit than I do
Stranger: hahaha fair enough man i was new to this to but u get used to it :)
Stranger: hahaha na mate ull get the hang of it soon
You: I only know how to rap, that's all I'm good at, haha
You: It's been good to talk to someone anonymously
Stranger: and ur brilliant at it mate, i doubt it i bet ur good at something else
You: Usually in real life, people see me and recognize me
Stranger: yeah dont worry mate im not goin to tell tons of people cause itll be unfair to you cause like u just want to talk
You: Thanks, man, I appreciate that
Stranger: and yeah thats true cause ur awwwwwsome haha
Stranger: no problem man
Stranger: so hows it goin?
You: It's all good. I watched some movies with my three girls today
You: And then I worked on one of my artist's albums
Stranger: nice mate what did u watch?
You: You heard of Yelawolf?
Stranger: yeah :) hes good
You: Make sure to cop his album, Nov 21!
You: I've been mixing his album down in the studio
Stranger: no problem mate i will
Stranger: itlll be good if did the mixing
Stranger: so what are u up to mate apart from this?
You: What's your name, man?
You: Oh that's right...
You: 50's asking me who I'm talking to
Stranger: its alright mate tell him i say high and love 21 questions
You: Haha, "thanks son"
Stranger: haha no problem :)
You: 50 sleeps at my house when he's in Detroit
Stranger: yeah thats really cool so hows he?
You: he's good. he's working on a new album too. It's hot
Stranger: nice man i bet it will be :)
You: Yo Kieran, I was tryna think of a song
You: To write yesterday
Stranger: yeah :)
Stranger: and hi man
You: what's going on in Scotland?
You: anything interesting I could write about?
Stranger: well some facts are we have the highest knife crime and nicest people so if u get stabbed we'll give u directions to a hospital
You: hahaha! that's funny shit
Stranger: haha thanks man funny thing is its true
You: i like the Scottish accent. it's dope
Stranger: thanks man amreican accents really cool
You: Yo, I know that my fanbase is pretty diverse and my music reaches a lot of people in a lotta different countries
You: but I'm not sure just how much y'all know about me in Scotland
Stranger: what u mean mate? like as a person cause see to be honest u guys are sound as anything
You: about my music?
You: does the average person know about my old music?
Stranger: ohhhhh right i get u now mate
You: i can tell you this one bar i was working on in a song called "Law", but you gotta promise me you can't tell nobody
Stranger: probaly thing is i was born in 95 so i might not know a lot but 21 questinos is a brilliant song takes me back to 2002
Stranger: i promiss mate
i keep promisses and ma friends can tell u that cross my heart
You: "such a bore, when I go to snap a bitch in 4/what you bitchin' for? you just a kitchen whore." those are the first two lines of Law
Stranger: there brilliant lines mate
You: thanks man
You: I've got a case of writer's block, though!
You: which ain't cool!
Stranger: yeah thats shit man
You: Haha, I needa call Paul and tell him I met this dope kid called Kieren from Scotland
Stranger: haha cool man ill be back in a sec
You: aight, i'ma wait
You: Haha, fuck...stupid keyboard man
Stranger: im back man
Stranger: haha its alright mate
You: where were you at?
Stranger: in ma house
You: What's the economy like over there?
You: Are there many jobs in Scotland?
Stranger: shite hahaha
Stranger: not at the moment but were trying to get independance fom england
You: those dudes speak fucked up!
Stranger: hahaha yeah ano man there voice is fuckin irritating
Stranger: by the way if u ever met me in person this is what im like
You: you're real, man
You: you talk to me like a normal person
You: you don't talk to me like i'm Eminem, which a lot of people do
You: i'm just Marshall
Stranger: yeah ur totaly sound mate i see all celebrities as normal people
You: yo, i got a call from my doctor the other day
Stranger: im actually really happy that i managed to talk to you
You: i gotta get a prostate exam soon!
You: I'm 39...i'm getting old, son!
Stranger: and yeah wat did he say
Stranger: awwww fuck man im hating that
Stranger: no ur not ur younger tahn ma mum mate
You: I think that's a topic I gotta address in my new album
You: That i'm middle aged now
You: Haha, it's weird how you spell it "mum" over there
Stranger: ohh yeah i fergot u guys spell it mom
You: you in school, Kieran?
Stranger: yeah its fuckin shite hahaha but im staying on to get like an education and stuff
You: stay in school, man
You: I dropped out
You: failed 9th grade 3 times
Stranger: thats crap mate but ur a genious song writter
You: my daughters are all in school now
Stranger: yeah how they getting on?
You: Hailie's 15, 16 in December
Stranger: thats cool she gettin a big party oor something?
You: her birthday is on Christmas, so it's a big celebration
You: and i got another girl, Alaina
You: she's 18
You: she's all grown up
Stranger: thats cool man be awsome i wish i could go but ud probably be like naw haha
Stranger: yeah thats cool haha yeah mum said that to me when i was 16
You: what did she say? that you was all grown up?
Stranger: yeah and im taller than her and she said will u stop growing haha
You: hey man, no disrespect, but I'm very guarded with my girls
You: I think you're a dope kid, but only Hailie's friends at her party
Stranger: yeah i can totaly understand that i would be to if i had daughters
You: maybe it might happen one day for you
You: it's an incredible feeling
Stranger: whats that having children?
You: yeah, man
You: Hey Kieran, you talked about all the knife crime. you don't get involved with that, do you?
Stranger: i would like 2 kids but thats in the future and no mate i dont i dont do drugs or smoke either
You: good for you
You: you don't wanna get in trouble with the law
You: I dunno if you heard about it, but I nearly went to jail a few years back
Stranger: thanks, yeah i dont want to, did you wat for mate
You: i saw a bouncer kissing my wife
You: so I punched him in the face
You: It was the wrong thing to do, and I paid the price
Stranger: fair enough mate i wouldve done the same
Stranger: thats crap though that u paid for it
You: Nah man, you don't wanna use violence
You: The media said that I hit him with a gun. But I didn't
You: Guerrerra, the bouncer I hit, he's full of shit, too
You: that was a fist that hit him
Stranger: but its technically mans instinct to do that and i believe u mate the news is full of lies
Stranger: hahaha nice
You: See, man
You: what I did was stupid, no doubt ...it was dumb
Stranger: yeah but its instinct for a man to do that though if u know what i mean
You: but the smartest shit I did was take the bullets out of that gun, Kieran
Stranger: hahaha nice move mate
Stranger: very smart
You: thanks, man. I appreciate that
You: I woulda killed him...I would've shot Kim and him both
Stranger: fuck man i understand that its horrible wen someone u love does that my 2nd girlfriend done that
Stranger: but i didnt have a gun or anything
You: fuck that! shoot that bitch!
You: can you afford to blow this shit?
You: why you give a fuck if she dies?
Stranger: i dunno man
You: so while you're at school she's with some dude trying to get off?
You: fuck slitting her throat Kieran, cut that bitch's head off
Stranger: well this is shit iv got to go to a christening and i want to stay and talk to you
You: No problem, man
Stranger: bit harsh but see your point
You: Sorry, man
You: I shouldn't be saying stuff that harsh
You: but sometimes women drive me up the wall
You: Go have fun at the christening, dude
You: I'ma log off now
Stranger: same mate ok ill probably see you at a show and say high haha
You: Do you mind if I say your name in one of my songs?
Stranger: hi not hig im fuckin idiot
Stranger: no man i dont
Stranger: do what u want
You: No problem, dude
You: good to talk to you!
Stranger: but u gotta tell me the song hahaha
Stranger: nice talkin to u and 50
You: 50's gone to sleep, but I'll tellhim you said bye
Stranger: haha he cant pull all nighters
Stranger: i can :O
You: the song will be called The Deceased
Stranger: ok dude
You: ok! peace out Kieran!
Stranger: ill write it down
Stranger: peace out Mashal
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