This is me, bored, pretending to be Eminem to some kid on a chat room. I'm sad. But it's pretty funny:

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

Stranger: i

Stranger: hi

You: yo, whattup

You: i'm Marshall

Stranger: cool nice to meet you im kieren

You: where you from?

Stranger: scotland you?

You: detroit

Stranger: cool

You: in america

Stranger: yeah

You: how old are you, kieren?

Stranger: 16, you?

You: 39

You: i got a daughter who's nearly 16

Stranger: cool wats it like in detroit the now?

You: detroit's in a bad place, man

Stranger: thats crap wats up man?

You: but we're strong. DETROIT!

You: STAND UP!

Stranger: i love this city

You: you love the D?

Stranger: sorry just had to lol

You: haha, it's cool

You: i think i been to Scotland a few times

You: i was at Edinburgh recently, doing a show

You: you guys are cool over there

Stranger: yeah its the capital

Stranger: nice wat show?

Stranger: haha thanks man so are u guys

You: a concert. i make music

You: i did a show called "T in the Park"

Stranger: nice i bet ur good at it if u were in a show

You: you heard of that?

You: oh sorry, Balado

Stranger: ohhhhh yeah its brilliant 

Stranger: balado?

You: Balado Park?

Stranger: iv not heard if it sorry :(

You: it's cool

You: i think i might be coming to Scotland again once i finish my next album

Stranger: nice wats it called?

You: the name of my new album? i dunno yet, man

You: i'll drop it when life tells me to

Stranger: ohhh right cool man and what?

You: at the moment i'm just banging out tracks in the studio

Stranger: cool :)

You: yeah

You: you might have heard of my last album Recovery?

Stranger: NO FUCKING WAY DUDE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Stranger: UR EMINEM???????

You: that's me

You: i'm just a normal person, man, don't freak out!

Stranger: i loved ur duet with rhianna man that song touched me i love ur work

Stranger: i know ur totaly sound mate

You: haha. thanks man, I appreciate that

Stranger: earlier i was like i was wondering if it was you but i was like no chance

You: Hey...I might be famous but I still go online

Stranger: true mate so what brings you to omegle?

You: well, I told my manager Paul that i wanted to go on the internet

Stranger: yeah

You: and he hit me up with this chat. I dunno how the shit works, to be honest

You: my daughters know more about this internet shit than I do

Stranger: hahaha fair enough man i was new to this to but u get used to it :)

Stranger: hahaha na mate ull get the hang of it soon

You: I only know how to rap, that's all I'm good at, haha

You: It's been good to talk to someone anonymously

Stranger: and ur brilliant at it mate, i doubt it i bet ur good at something else

You: Usually in real life, people see me and recognize me

Stranger: yeah dont worry mate im not goin to tell tons of people cause itll be unfair to you cause like u just want to talk

You: Thanks, man, I appreciate that

Stranger: and yeah thats true cause ur awwwwwsome haha

Stranger: no problem man

Stranger: so hows it goin? 

You: It's all good. I watched some movies with my three girls today

You: And then I worked on one of my artist's albums

Stranger: nice mate what did u watch? 

Stranger: cool

You: You heard of Yelawolf?

Stranger: yeah :) hes good

You: Make sure to cop his album, Nov 21!

You: I've been mixing his album down in the studio

Stranger: no problem mate i will

Stranger: itlll be good if did the mixing

Stranger: so what are u up to mate apart from this?

You: What's your name, man?

Stranger: Kieren

You: Oh that's right...

You: 50's asking me who I'm talking to

Stranger: its alright mate tell him i say high and love 21 questions

You: Haha, "thanks son"

Stranger: haha no problem :)

You: 50 sleeps at my house when he's in Detroit

Stranger: yeah thats really cool so hows he?

You: he's good. he's working on a new album too. It's hot

Stranger: nice man i bet it will be :)

You: Yo Kieran, I was tryna think of a song

You: To write yesterday

Stranger: yeah :)

Stranger: and hi man

You: what's going on in Scotland?

You: anything interesting I could write about?

Stranger: well some facts are we have the highest knife crime and nicest people so if u get stabbed we'll give u directions to a hospital

Stranger: hahaha

You: hahaha! that's funny shit

Stranger: haha thanks man funny thing is its true

You: i like the Scottish accent. it's dope

Stranger: thanks man amreican accents really cool

You: Yo, I know that my fanbase is pretty diverse and my music reaches a lot of people in a lotta different countries

You: but I'm not sure just how much y'all know about me in Scotland

Stranger: what u mean mate? like as a person cause see to be honest u guys are sound as anything

You: about my music?

You: does the average person know about my old music?

Stranger: ohhhhh right i get u now mate

You: i can tell you this one bar i was working on in a song called "Law", but you gotta promise me you can't tell nobody

Stranger: probaly thing is i was born in 95 so i might not know a lot but 21 questinos is a brilliant song takes me back to 2002

Stranger: i promiss mate
i keep promisses and ma friends can tell u that cross my heart 

You: "such a bore, when I go to snap a bitch in 4/what you bitchin' for? you just a kitchen whore." those are the first two lines of Law

Stranger: there brilliant lines mate

You: thanks man

You: I've got a case of writer's block, though!

You: which ain't cool!

Stranger: yeah thats shit man

You: Haha, I needa call Paul and tell him I met this dope kid called Kieren from Scotland

Stranger: haha cool man ill be back in a sec

You: aight, i'ma wait

You: ujdfd

You: Haha, fuck...stupid keyboard man

Stranger: im back man

Stranger: haha its alright mate

You: where were you at?

Stranger: in ma house

You: What's the economy like over there?

You: Are there many jobs in Scotland?

Stranger: shite hahaha

Stranger: not at the moment but were trying to get independance fom england

Stranger: from*

You: england

You: those dudes speak fucked up!

Stranger: hahaha yeah ano man there voice is fuckin irritating

Stranger: by the way if u ever met me in person this is what im like 

You: you're real, man

You: you talk to me like a normal person

You: you don't talk to me like i'm Eminem, which a lot of people do

You: i'm just Marshall

Stranger: yeah ur totaly sound mate i see all celebrities as normal people 

You: yo, i got a call from my doctor the other day

Stranger: im actually really happy that i managed to talk to you

You: i gotta get a prostate exam soon!

You: I'm 39...i'm getting old, son!

Stranger: and yeah wat did he say 

Stranger: awwww fuck man im hating that

Stranger: no ur not ur younger tahn ma mum mate 

Stranger: than*

You: I think that's a topic I gotta address in my new album

You: That i'm middle aged now

Stranger: yeah

You: Haha, it's weird how you spell it "mum" over there

Stranger: ohh yeah i fergot u guys spell it mom

You: Yeah

You: you in school, Kieran?

Stranger: yeah its fuckin shite hahaha but im staying on to get like an education and stuff 

You: stay in school, man

You: I dropped out

You: failed 9th grade 3 times

Stranger: thats crap mate but ur a genious song writter

You: my daughters are all in school now

Stranger: yeah how they getting on?

You: Hailie's 15, 16 in December

Stranger: thats cool she gettin a big party oor something?

Stranger: or*

You: yeah

You: her birthday is on Christmas, so it's a big celebration

You: and i got another girl, Alaina

You: she's 18

You: she's all grown up

Stranger: thats cool man be awsome i wish i could go but ud probably be like naw haha

Stranger: yeah thats cool haha yeah mum said that to me when i was 16

You: what did she say? that you was all grown up?

Stranger: yeah and im taller than her and she said will u stop growing haha

You: hey man, no disrespect, but I'm very guarded with my girls

You: I think you're a dope kid, but only Hailie's friends at her party

Stranger: yeah i can totaly understand that i would be to if i had daughters

You: maybe it might happen one day for you

You: it's an incredible feeling

Stranger: whats that having children?

You: yeah, man

You: Hey Kieran, you talked about all the knife crime. you don't get involved with that, do you?

Stranger: i would like 2 kids but thats in the future and no mate i dont i dont do drugs or smoke either 

You: good for you

You: you don't wanna get in trouble with the law

You: I dunno if you heard about it, but I nearly went to jail a few years back

Stranger: thanks, yeah i dont want to, did you wat for mate

You: i saw a bouncer kissing my wife

You: so I punched him in the face

You: It was the wrong thing to do, and I paid the price

Stranger: fair enough mate i wouldve done the same 

Stranger: thats crap though that u paid for it

You: Nah man, you don't wanna use violence

You: The media said that I hit him with a gun. But I didn't

You: Guerrerra, the bouncer I hit, he's full of shit, too

You: that was a fist that hit him

Stranger: but its technically mans instinct to do that and i believe u mate the news is full of lies

Stranger: hahaha nice

You: See, man

You: what I did was stupid, no doubt ...it was dumb

Stranger: yeah but its instinct for a man to do that though if u know what i mean

You: but the smartest shit I did was take the bullets out of that gun, Kieran

Stranger: hahaha nice move mate 

Stranger: very smart

You: thanks, man. I appreciate that

You: I woulda killed him...I would've shot Kim and him both

Stranger: fuck man i understand that its horrible wen someone u love does that my 2nd girlfriend done that

Stranger: but i didnt have a gun or anything

You: fuck that! shoot that bitch!

You: can you afford to blow this shit?

You: why you give a fuck if she dies?

Stranger: i dunno man

You: so while you're at school she's with some dude trying to get off?

You: fuck slitting her throat Kieran, cut that bitch's head off

Stranger: well this is shit iv got to go to a christening and i want to stay and talk to you

You: No problem, man

Stranger: bit harsh but see your point

You: Sorry, man

You: I shouldn't be saying stuff that harsh

You: but sometimes women drive me up the wall

You: Go have fun at the christening, dude

You: I'ma log off now

Stranger: same mate ok ill probably see you at a show and say high haha

You: Do you mind if I say your name in one of my songs?

Stranger: hi not hig im fuckin idiot

Stranger: no man i dont 

Stranger: do what u want

You: No problem, dude

You: good to talk to you!

Stranger: but u gotta tell me the song hahaha

Stranger: nice talkin to u and 50 

You: 50's gone to sleep, but I'll tellhim you said bye

You: haha

Stranger: haha he cant pull all nighters

Stranger: i can :O

Stranger: haha

You: the song will be called The Deceased

Stranger: ok dude 

You: ok! peace out Kieran!

Stranger: ill write it down

Stranger: peace out Mashal